I would like to start out by saying that NO, I am not pregnant.
But I would like to be.
And that's OK.
And the fact that I would like to be pregnant again is a personal decision between myself, my husband, and God.
There are those who will hear me say that I would love to be pregnant again right now and they will balk at the very thought. They will call it crazy or even irresponsible.
But the truth is: maybe we are a little crazy. For babies :)
You see, whether or not we have any more babies really has no impact on your life. It impacts mine, ours, my little family's. But not yours. So, really, you don't need to worry about it.
But because I know some people will, I'd like to say a few things.
We love kids. We love our children, every single one of them, with equal love. We love them even with the messes and the noise and the chaos that is sometimes our life.
The shrieks and squeals and laughter don't bother us. In fact, we like them. They are the background music of our life.
We truly believe each child is a blessing from God.
I am not one of those people who will tell you that you are going to hell if you "only" have a certain number of children. Or that you are headed there for using birth control or getting your tubes tied. I will tell you I think you'd be blessed beyond measure by adding more kids to your family, but I don't think God will smite you if you don't. I just think you'll be missing out on additional blessings you could get.
The thought of being huge and sweaty and peeing every 20 minutes doesn't bother me. I love being pregnant. And no, I don't think my uterus is going to explode any time soon (if you don't know what I'm talking about, I'll have to find the video for you, LOL). I feel more healthy right now than I have in years.
The thought of facing labor again doesn't bother me. I love labor and delivery!
The thought of having two kids in diapers does not phase me. I've done it before and the world did not end.
The thought that, "I just can't keep up with any more," or, "I don't have the energy/sanity/(insert choice word here) to handle that," does not cross my mind. I know full well I can keep up with several more. I used to teach eight two year olds at a time for nine straight hours without a break. I can handle two or three five and unders. Trust me. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!
The thought of "affording" another child does not phase me either. If you really think about it, adding another child does not increase the household expenditures all that much. The rent doesn't go up. The utility bills don't go up. The amount of gas you use does not go up. Even the food budget doesn't really increase. By the time another one would be born, Andrew will be eating "big people" food. So even though we would buy formula and baby food for a new baby, the budget would not change, because we buy it now anyway.
The thought of "stretching" my time and energy for another child is not an issue for me. The only time I had to adjust to sharing myself among multiple children was between child one and child two. Once I got to child three, it just came naturally.
And for those who feel they must know, yes, we can afford another child. We pay our own rent. We pay our own bills. We buy our own food. We pay our own insurance. We buy our own medicine. We put gas in our own cars, which we paid in full when we bought them. Our kids' closets are full. Our kitchen is stocked. We have no debt. Well, we still have medical bills from when Andrew was born, but we will have those paid off by the end of this month. We try not to spend extravagantly. On occasion we get in a tight spot. We sometimes borrow from my dad to get something paid, but we always pay him back. (Yes, always!) There have been times that good Christian friends have helped us out. Sometimes their help is a gift, sometimes something we pay back. On the flip side, we help others when we can. That is what "the church" (the people of Christian faith) is supposed to do. That is what they did in the Bible. They pooled their resources so everyone was taken care of.
Our marriage is strong. Our family is solid. Our children are happy and healthy and smart. Our life is good, blessed. Since we gave over control of my womb to God, we have been even more blessed than we ever were before.
So...if I say I want to be pregnant...or better yet, if I announce that I am pregnant...it doesn't mean I expect you to have another baby, and it doesn't mean I think I am "holier than thou."
What it does mean is that we are expecting and accepting all the blessings God will give us, and we are happy about it. It is a wondrous thing to bring a child into the world. Every child is worth loving and being happy about. All we want is to be able to say, "I want another baby," or "We're pregnant again!" without getting negative comments or strange looks in response. All we want is for you to say, "Wow, that's great! Congratulations!"
You may think it's crazy. But we think it's wonderful (and a little crazy, too, but in a great way)!